Have you ever noticed that people tend to love others in a way that feels good and convenient to them? Some may like to show love by cooking and create amazing culinary experiences – just forgetting to check if their loved ones are hungry or feel like eating! Some may feel good counselling and tend to offer coaching/advice, when their loved ones just want to vent or aren’t ready to hear it. Others may buy beautiful presents as a way of showing love, when perhaps what was needed most from them was their time.
I’m not trying to blame or point fingers here as we all do this by default; we tend to love people in a way that makes us feel good for loving them without checking if it makes them feel good! Being aware of this concept can be a game changer, it allows us to check what the people in our lives need from us. Have you ever thought of what makes your partner, child or best friend feel loved? It may be very different from what you are doing. If you don’t know, you could simple ask them and it could be the start of an interesting conversation that creates more intimacy.
I invite you this month to pick one person in your life, discover what truly makes them feel loved, and begin to love them in that way. The law of reciprocity says that once you start giving in this way, you will also begin to receive love in a way that makes you feel loved too (from the same person or someone else)! Please feel free to share your feedback and let us know how this worked for you.